John scheck

Author-Humorist

La Frontera Saga is on sale!

It’s taken long enough, but my first novel is finally available. It’s called La Frontera Saga. I hope you enjoy it. Paperback edition is now up and for sale.

Small Mercies by Dennis Lehane

I’m not a person anymore, Bobby. I’m a testament.” “What?” “That’s what ghosts are—they’re testaments to what never should have happened and must be fixed before their spirits leave this world.” -Mary Pat Fennessy Mary Pat is about the toughest broad you’ll come across, either in fiction or in person, and heaven help you if […]

Don’t Quote Me

“Persistence is way over-rated. Go ahead, give up. Just quit. You don’t have to prove anything to anyone, and least of all not to yourself. And whatever the hell it is that you’re trying to do, can you at least put on a shirt?”― John Scheck

Wait! What Did You Just Call Me?

Conversation with a friend while watching Valencia Club de Fútbol and drinking a couple of beers. Friend: You look good. Have you lost weight? Me: Not really. I’m about the same weight as I’ve been for a while. Friend: You’ve been fatter. Me: Thanks, that’s the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.

Nurturing the Soul for Psychopaths

1. Take a long walk at a landfill. 2. Write your name in the fresh snow with diarrhea. 3. Savor the joyous laughter of children after you push their dad* down some stairs. 4. Take a nice hot bath in a home you’re robbing, and don’t be afraid to tell the victims tied up in […]

Francois Couperin – Les Baricades Mistérieuses

I should have waited to film this, or took a few more takes, but I’m not completely disgusted with the result. In my defense, I’m much worse at making videos than playing the piano. I’m almost at the point when I can say that I play the piano and keep a straight face.

Bragging Rights

I just had to tell someone so please excuse this bit of bragging on my part. I was writing something* and I used the term “auto-erotica asphyxiation” and get this: I spelled it right on the first try! It was sort of like hitting a hole-in-one when you’re golfing alone. *A movie review of Tenemos […]

Sorry?

No one could ever accuse me of being a vegan, but when a recipe calls for chicken and eggs, it just seems a bit much. I mean, you’re eating the chicken itself and you’re going after its offspring, too? What’s next? A recipe that calls for a chicken’s hopes and dreams?